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我哭得很惨
哭得歇底斯里
不停地哭
眼泪不停地往下掉
我控制不了它
脑海里一直浮现我成绩表
那是多么令我沮丧的一幕
我很难过
难过到自己也控制不到自己
很讨厌自己
讨厌自己怎么生得这么笨
怎么自己怎么懒惰
怎么自己这么没考试运
哭了一整个下午
一整天都没吃
再加昨晚又没睡
我人不像人鬼不像鬼
看着镜子里的我
第一次有种冲动
想把自己杀掉
免得阻碍地球转
我想停学
我知道这个决定大家一定会说
我决定得很仓促
我以后一定会后悔的
和阿姐聊了42分钟的电话
她特地从新加坡打来给我
我姐她安慰了我很多很多
说了很多我停学后带来的不好
我越听她说
我越难过
身边的同学们
ab,fish,chee meng和阿欣
频频地劝我我别这样就放弃
大不了就重考
没什么大不了
人生中总会遇到挫折
而且这只不过是一个小小的问题
大家劝我去休息
去洗把脸去睡个觉
不要想这么多
现在的我心情无法叙述
只想再大哭一场
[无法挽留]
what a fuckin nite
feel sad n cherish what i own before
my house get thief break in
i curse them
curse them who break my house
go die as fast as possible
my daddy lovely car gaved stolen too
i damn sad
but my daddy damn down n sad than me
"daddy,i know that."
just go out dinner
not enough half an hour
around 9pm
me,mommy n lunce gonna take dinner
when we reach McD
we saw inside there many people
so we decided take away
after we pay n get d food
i suddenly suggest
take those food in there
can get more FREE chili n tomato sauce
in case we not enough =)
about 9.15pm
mommy pick up call to daddy
daddy said he on d way back home
bcoz my daddy out station KL tat day
tat y he din take dinner wit us tat nite
around 9.30pm
mommy gonna receive from daddy
daddy told us
our house break in by CB thief
n also our lovely new car-VIOS
gone also..what the hell~~
mommy shout=.=
we all almost cant control anymore
i be driver that moment
maybe is bcoz i be driver that nite
just bcoz the McD sticker
i drive kelisa went out
if i drive Vios
daddy lovely's car wont stolen by them
i feel guilty~is my fault
i know.i und.='(
mommy lovely swatch-Bonia
who presented by sister
as mother's day present
and 3 more brand swatch
all gone~='(
daddy lovely gold swatch
gone too~=(
all mommy gold+platinum jewelleries
my sis-Phoeon just gave to daddy n mommy
pocket money-singapore $2000++
equal to RM6000++
what the hell~
all GONE.
i really feel sad n guilty
if i stay at home
wont happened this
why i wanna follow go out dinner that nite??!
is my fault..='(
mommy try to console me
she said luckily i follow
(because normally i din take dinner,so will stay at home.)
if i din follow
what will happen
who know??...
i know mommy try to console me
tq,mommy.
i dunno what Malaysia police doing
how come they action damn slow
we report at 10pm
but around 2am
police only come to check hand impression
and take few "stupid photo"
damn USELESS!!
we cant do anything when we waiting crops come
just blur blur sit at living room's sofa
i hope pass the time as fast as possible
bcoz i know mommy damn tired that time
And i feel guilty once again
because i cant help daddy do anything that time
daddy gonna rush go main ipoh police station again
to report our car be lost and pass up the car document.
Phoeon working at singapore now
i become the eldest sister in home
but i didnt do anything
i USELESS
i know.i und ='(
daddy n mommy tell me
luckily maybe they tot us just only take away
must wanna action faster
that y we lucky abit
bcoz my house 2 desktop+me and lunce's laptop
totally 4 computer din gave stole
and luckily i follow dinner
anyway,thank god.=)
[Goodbye,my car~TAN 3863)
这一刻的我第一次觉得自己是这样的emo的原来我也有这样的一面我清楚知道自己emo的原因
替自己觉得很可悲
感觉自己被孤立了
虽然大家并没有这样对我
可是就觉得自己总是跟不上大家的脚步
是因为自己的没有别人来得平易近人吧
或许都是自己的问题
group assignment搞到最后
自己竟然没有了组别
大家很快就有了各自的组别
就剩下自己一个....
知道自己有多少斤两
总结来说
自己就是比别人差一大段的那种
没有口才之余
连创意都没有
人家说天生我材必有用
可是突然觉得自己一点用都没有
什么忙都帮不上
什么东西都不会都不懂
或许我不应该继续读下去了
读过from6的我
又有什么用
来到学院这里
有时就连普通的常识都比别人差
还要年纪比我小的同学教我
我到底在干嘛
我不知道
我只知道这一刻的我
是多么的没用
像垃圾一样='(
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